88

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

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So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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whats forever alone me

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why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

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What did the white cop say to the black thug? he didn't... he got shot before he could say anything

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A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

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68

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What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Q: What comes after 8? A: 9

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how long has dibey got left like :)

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What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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