why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

So there are two elephants in a bathtub. Elephant 1: "yo can you pass the shampoo" Elephant 2: "radio!"

OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

Hey, I just met you and i am crazy, but? here's my room key let's make a baby.

170

Why did the mouse cross the road, and then go down it? It tried to get cheese on the other side, but got hit by a SUV and was stuck to the wheels. The rat on the wheel goes "Squish, Scratch,, Mush........

POOP FART BUTTS HAHAHA!!!!

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

When Life throws you lemons you might be hallucinating

Why did the Black man drown? Because he could not and did not know how to swim. Because he could not afford the lessons to learn how to swim. Because he does not have the financial means to afford a lesson in swimming. Because he is of a low socio-economic level.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

once upon a time jeff peterson was taking a daily walk when he stops and stares at a strange object. it was an assasin with a knife who slaughtered jeff decapitating his head while his family cry's. THE END

Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

Why did the black man work at a Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because he was fired from his job at a grocery store, and it was the only job he could find on short notice in the current job market.

What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Knock knock? Whos there? the Chicken.

LIKE THIS!

What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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