That moment when you and your friends throw snowballs at cars in the dark on the highway and the cops spotlight your area while you hide in a shed...

Your mom is so ugly, she buys groceries at the grocery store.

What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

Hey, I just met you and i am crazy, but? here's my room key let's make a baby.

a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

why did the rabit lose the race? it was a dumb@$$

A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

Two white people walk into a bar what do they say? "hi"

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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