Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

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I heard you like playing basketball at night. My ears are fully functional in comprehension of human language and therefore I am able to listen and remember words that are told by others.

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What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

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How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

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There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

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Two white people walk into a bar what do they say? "hi"

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

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it all started when it all started when i was born because i was the resault of a broken condom and thats why he left. shortly after my mother killed herself. well thats the way the cookie crumbles. its not a joke i just needed to tell someone.

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

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whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

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What's The Difference Between a Chicken and a Human. Well a Chicken Is A Chicken and a Human Is a Human.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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why did the bear eat meat? he was hungry

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whats 2+2? gonorrhea.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

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What do you call a black guy going into mcdonalds A great opportunity to make a raciest joke

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What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

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What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Knock knock? Whos there? the Chicken.

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A Mexican, a Jew and an African walk into a bar. Now, it seem it was the Jew's turn to pay for drinks. So, all three ordered drinks, and the Jew paid for them.

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What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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