whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

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What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

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what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

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OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

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Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

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A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

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That other group is a *********************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************** From Jackson Edwards

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What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

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When Life throws you lemons you might be hallucinating

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Knock knock. It's me, the ratboy genius.

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What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

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Q: What did Micheal Jackson Say to the boys? A: He can't speak because he's dead.

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A n antelope walks into a bar and many people leave for the sake of their safety and animal control gets called to escort the antelope out of the bar.

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Sarah Palin

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So a man is shopping on black Friday...

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i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

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what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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