So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

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What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

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whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

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An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

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Why did Tesco not serve a black guy? Because he just happen to be holding a gun

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Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

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whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

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Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

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How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

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you want to hear a joke? the goverment.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

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Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

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Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

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When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

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What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

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An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops