Knock knock Who's there? Yolanda I do not know anyone by that name. I am sorry Oh I must be at the wrong house. My apologies. Oh, it's alright. Have a nice day You too. Take care!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the car stop? There was a fridge in the road

thumb_up thumb_down +138

Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: What did Micheal Jackson Say to the boys? A: He can't speak because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Three a man is trapped on a desert island and a genie offers to grant him one wish. The man accepts the existence of the genie and then wishes for unlimited wishes for the rest of his life. The man takes over the world.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What did your mom say to your dad? A: Honey i want a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the wife not in the kitchen? The husband's gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

thumb_up thumb_down -32

No, I still have to make sense of some facts bits and pieces here, and thinking is pretty much the only thing I can do at this moment, so why would my doppelganger wannabe call me from her mothers place?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Tim tebow is the anti christ

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +113

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops