Q: How mature are you on a scale of 1 to 100? A: 69. :)

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69

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Nah, its fine, I just went to get a popsicle, and its square, so don't get any ideas. Honestly? When I first met "some jerk" calling himself Nero here, I began calling myself Nero, because I thought that the jerk that turned out to be you, Nero himself, sigh. was screwing over his own reputation. But now I realize that what makes you who you are, is that you say whats on your mind without going "oh no what will others think about me, what if this or that happens", you accept yourself for who you are, and if the rest do not, well screw them right? As you told me at first and proved to me during our conversations, you respect and value individuality and integrity. And well, you are a guy, you think like a guy (I honestly dont think we girls think that differently, we are simply socially indoctrinated or "engineered" in order to think that we do), I mean let me say something really honest here. Nero, I only dare say this once, so take me seriously I really want you to fuck me, and yeah, I may say that when we meet too, considering I have not even said it yet, just in my head... Anyway, its not something I am insecure about nor ever was and blahblahblah, the end, oh, and yeah, I really want and need a friend like you.

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

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So a man is shopping on black Friday...

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There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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Why was the wife not in the kitchen? The husband's gay.

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Knock Knock Who's There? God God who.....wait REALLY? No Dave, this is a hallucination, and your peeing right now.

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If a man without hands is called a handicap, what do you call a man without legs? A handicap.

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How do you keep a mexican from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head.

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What's the difference between gold and silver? Atomic number

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Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

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Womens rights

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What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

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Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

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Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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Q: What did your mom say to your dad? A: Honey i want a divorce.

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What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

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No, I still have to make sense of some facts bits and pieces here, and thinking is pretty much the only thing I can do at this moment, so why would my doppelganger wannabe call me from her mothers place?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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