What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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I heard you like playing basketball at night. My ears are fully functional in comprehension of human language and therefore I am able to listen and remember words that are told by others.

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What's the difference between gold and silver? Atomic number

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

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Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

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whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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iff god whas funny why thit he let your mother be raped and your sister murdered en iff satan whos a ice cream will he taste sweet ?

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Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

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How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

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Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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What's The Difference Between a Chicken and a Human. Well a Chicken Is A Chicken and a Human Is a Human.

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What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

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Why did the person post a real joke with bad grammar and spelling on anti-joke.com? They didn't flippin' understand the point of the website.

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A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

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What will Postman Pat be called after he retires? Pat.

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Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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Your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you're just a figment of my imagination.\

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

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How do you keep a mexican from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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