What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

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Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

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So a man is shopping on black Friday...

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When Life throws you lemons you might be hallucinating

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

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If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

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Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

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Nah, its fine, I just went to get a popsicle, and its square, so don't get any ideas. Honestly? When I first met "some jerk" calling himself Nero here, I began calling myself Nero, because I thought that the jerk that turned out to be you, Nero himself, sigh. was screwing over his own reputation. But now I realize that what makes you who you are, is that you say whats on your mind without going "oh no what will others think about me, what if this or that happens", you accept yourself for who you are, and if the rest do not, well screw them right? As you told me at first and proved to me during our conversations, you respect and value individuality and integrity. And well, you are a guy, you think like a guy (I honestly dont think we girls think that differently, we are simply socially indoctrinated or "engineered" in order to think that we do), I mean let me say something really honest here. Nero, I only dare say this once, so take me seriously I really want you to fuck me, and yeah, I may say that when we meet too, considering I have not even said it yet, just in my head... Anyway, its not something I am insecure about nor ever was and blahblahblah, the end, oh, and yeah, I really want and need a friend like you.

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

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whats 2+2? gonorrhea.

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

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Here's a joke for u Hahaha suck on it I wasnt going to make u laugh o yea ur mom died

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Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

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Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

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What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

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What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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