Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

Womens rights

So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

iff god whas funny why thit he let your mother be raped and your sister murdered en iff satan whos a ice cream will he taste sweet ?

whats the problem with black and mexican jokes? once youve heard juan youve heard jamal

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

So a man is shopping on black Friday...

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

Why can't a T-Rex clap? Because they're extinct

you want to hear a joke? the goverment.

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

Tim tebow is the anti christ

What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

what did the blind santa say to the jewish child jewish people don't believe in santa...awkward.

What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

Why did the car stop? There was a fridge in the road

How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

So there are two elephants in a bathtub. Elephant 1: "yo can you pass the shampoo" Elephant 2: "radio!"

Two white people walk into a bar what do they say? "hi"

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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