whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

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How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

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Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

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why did the jew drop his coin? beacuse a nazi killed him before he put it in his pocket

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Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

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Why can't a T-Rex clap? Because they're extinct

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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I heard you like playing basketball at night. My ears are fully functional in comprehension of human language and therefore I am able to listen and remember words that are told by others.

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There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

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Q: How mature are you on a scale of 1 to 100? A: 69. :)

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Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

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So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

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What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

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A man goes to Church he meets God nothing happens

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Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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