PENIS THAT IS ALL!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

George Bush.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man goes to Church he meets God nothing happens

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What will Postman Pat be called after he retires? Pat.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

knock knock who's there? refelection reflection who? reflection in the mirror, it's you -lINDz@Y $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ s/0 to my B0oFrand J0rdan MiLaRR

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

I heard you like playing basketball at night. My ears are fully functional in comprehension of human language and therefore I am able to listen and remember words that are told by others.

thumb_up thumb_down -113

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's The Difference Between a Chicken and a Human. Well a Chicken Is A Chicken and a Human Is a Human.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops