Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS and now you do too!

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Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Why was the little Jewish girl sad? Because neo-Nazis killed her family.

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

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What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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What did the convicted necrophiliac pedophile do when he found a dead baby? He reported it to the authorities because despite his past habits and behaviour, and after years of rehabilitation he became a responsible and considerate citizen

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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Justin Bieber.

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why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

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When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

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What's the difference between gold and silver? Atomic number

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Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

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Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

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What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Knock knock? Whos there? the Chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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