What happens when you put a cat in an oven? Don't, because it will die.

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whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

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What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

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Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

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A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

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So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

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What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

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why was the boy sad? his friend got hit by a bus.

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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whats the problem with black and mexican jokes? once youve heard juan youve heard jamal

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a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

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The sons of modern psychology: COCAINE MOTHERF8CKERS! COMING OUT IN YOUR CINEMA RENTAL STORE YESTERDAY! Sold out. (yesterday)

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Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

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Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

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why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

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Justin Bieber.

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Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

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How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

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Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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