What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

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Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? I don't know man, but you touch yourself at night.

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if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

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What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

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A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

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holocaust jokes are bad, anne frankly they annoy me

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rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

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You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

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385

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What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

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What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

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A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

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What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

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Yo Momma's so fat she has Type 1 Diabetes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS and now you do too!

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What did the convicted necrophiliac pedophile do when he found a dead baby? He reported it to the authorities because despite his past habits and behaviour, and after years of rehabilitation he became a responsible and considerate citizen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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