rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

Whats 1+1? Well,According to John Willemain's Business Analysis: Problem Solving Using Calculus and Finite Mathematics it's 2.

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

What's the difference between gold and silver? Atomic number

Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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