Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

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What happens when you put a cat in an oven? Don't, because it will die.

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

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Two Irish men walk into a bar, order a drink and sit down to enjoy the drink and friednly conversation.

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Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

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Why was the wife not in the kitchen? The husband's gay.

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

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what did the blind santa say to the jewish child jewish people don't believe in santa...awkward.

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A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

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Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

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What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

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Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

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what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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