A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

Why is a bear like a cloud? They are both blue.

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

Whats white and all over my room? paint

The Olympics

how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS and now you do too!

A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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