whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

thumb_up thumb_down +44

a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There once was a man from Nantucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +97

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

thumb_up thumb_down +27

knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS and now you do too!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops