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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

why did the boy fall down? he was shot

*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

black people. that is all...

Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

A Mexican, a Jew and an African walk into a bar. Now, it seem it was the Jew's turn to pay for drinks. So, all three ordered drinks, and the Jew paid for them.

If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

Hey, I just met you and i am crazy, but? here's my room key let's make a baby.

How did the black man get a new television? He worked hard and put away a small percentage of his weekly wage in order to save for this new addition to his household.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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