Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

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How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

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Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

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Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

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what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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20

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

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A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

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Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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holocaust jokes are bad, anne frankly they annoy me

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how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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Your mom is so ugly, she buys groceries at the grocery store.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

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Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops