what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

holocaust jokes are bad, anne frankly they annoy me

A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

Your mom is so ugly, she buys groceries at the grocery store.

Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

20

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A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

What is the difference in a dead dog in the road, and a dead black guy in the road? One was a dog and one was a human being..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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