rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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