i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

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Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

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A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

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Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

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An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

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Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

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A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

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did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? I don't know man, but you touch yourself at night.

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Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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