when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

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20

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"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

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Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

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What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

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69

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A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

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why did the boy fall down? he was shot

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a scizophrenic, Or at least thats what the voices tell me.

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boobs

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A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

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How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

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Why was Tom flunking in school? He had a learning disability.

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How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

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One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

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whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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