What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

What is the difference in a dead dog in the road, and a dead black guy in the road? One was a dog and one was a human being..

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

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Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

What did the convicted necrophiliac pedophile do when he found a dead baby? He reported it to the authorities because despite his past habits and behaviour, and after years of rehabilitation he became a responsible and considerate citizen

HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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