Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS and now you do too!

Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

POOP FART BUTTS HAHAHA!!!!

Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

porcupines love sun bathing in the winter months so it dosent rape their nose hairs

Whats white and all over my room? paint

What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

Why did the policeman arrest the black man? He had commited a crime and murdered somebody.

What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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