Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the Mxican eat the taco? Because he was hungry,

thumb_up thumb_down -23

boobs

thumb_up thumb_down -25

The Olympics

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

thumb_up thumb_down -43

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

thumb_up thumb_down -171

Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

thumb_up thumb_down +170

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +162

pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

thumb_up thumb_down +50

An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats 1+1? Well,According to John Willemain's Business Analysis: Problem Solving Using Calculus and Finite Mathematics it's 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops