Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the policeman arrest the black man? He had commited a crime and murdered somebody.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There once was a man from Nantucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +166

I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down +126

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

thumb_up thumb_down +48

whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

thumb_up thumb_down +44

"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

thumb_up thumb_down +36

I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a scizophrenic, Or at least thats what the voices tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops