Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Are you a tree? No.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

I have no soul so I must consume yours

A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

sexual intercourse.

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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