How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

thumb_up thumb_down +190

If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +140

Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

call of duty world at war

thumb_up thumb_down +36

69

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How are you this morning?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -122

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

thumb_up thumb_down +159

What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +85

a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

thumb_up thumb_down +49

A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Well, she did.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops