Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

5

My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

one day a grape was in the sun raisin

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

I'm hungry.

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

what did the man say to the other man? hi

1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...