My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

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Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

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Dont look at me.

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Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

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What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

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Are you a tree? No.

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What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

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Knock knock Who's there? Yolanda I do not know anyone by that name. I am sorry Oh I must be at the wrong house. My apologies. Oh, it's alright. Have a nice day You too. Take care!

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Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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one day a grape was in the sun raisin

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

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3 jews walk into a bar I lied it was a gas chamber

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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PENIS THAT IS ALL!

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what sucks? things that suck

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops