What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

Knock knock Who's there? Yolanda I do not know anyone by that name. I am sorry Oh I must be at the wrong house. My apologies. Oh, it's alright. Have a nice day You too. Take care!

What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

PENIS THAT IS ALL!

3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

what sucks? things that suck

170

cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

Why did the Mxican eat the taco? Because he was hungry,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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