A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

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What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

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Are women better than men? Dont know but what we do know is they swing at bigger balls (softballs), shoot from lower basketball nets, do pushups from their knees. Shall I go on?

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You

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

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3 jews walk into a bar I lied it was a gas chamber

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? I don't know man, but you touch yourself at night.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

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Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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