how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How are you this morning?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats 1+1? Well,According to John Willemain's Business Analysis: Problem Solving Using Calculus and Finite Mathematics it's 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I have no soul so I must consume yours

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Uh, "Abel", seriously get over here and then get some sleep, not only did you get the code all wrong, there is no number to be deciphered at all, besides its called a laptop with a battery. Speaking of general dumbass... You have not changed the least, you really remind me of a cruel, sloppy, less disciplined (except the wise cracking thing Nero resorted to to push me away and apparently dodge gun fire, maybe his way of handling nerves. You might look like him, but personality wise you are completely different, cruel, sloppy, graphical, I mean did you ever see Nero get angry? I never did. That said Neo-Nero, you are a nice guy too, especially if you get here fast enough, I mean this place is freezing.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats white and all over my room? paint

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Having a refrigerator fall on you

thumb_up thumb_down -150

Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

thumb_up thumb_down +195

What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

thumb_up thumb_down +111

when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +35

a black man jumps in a pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops