A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

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Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

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So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

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If you wanna hear a joke scroll down this page more

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George Bush.

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knock knock who's there? refelection reflection who? reflection in the mirror, it's you -lINDz@Y $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ s/0 to my B0oFrand J0rdan MiLaRR

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine [Emo Philips]

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Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

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PENIS THAT IS ALL!

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A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops