My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

George Bush.

Are women better than men? Dont know but what we do know is they swing at bigger balls (softballs), shoot from lower basketball nets, do pushups from their knees. Shall I go on?

When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

What is it called when a black man does cocaine? A felony.

Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

Justin Bieber

why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

170

What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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