What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

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I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

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How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

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Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

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Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

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Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

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Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

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9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

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What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

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A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

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Men's Rights

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How are you this morning?

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My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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