Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

thumb_up thumb_down -50

A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

thumb_up thumb_down -78

What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How are you this morning?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

thumb_up thumb_down +7

HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the white cop say to the black thug? he didn't... he got shot before he could say anything

thumb_up thumb_down -1

*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

thumb_up thumb_down -41

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -49

If a man without hands is called a handicap, what do you call a man without legs? A handicap.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops