Q: Whats worse than 17 babies in 1 bin. A: 1 baby in 17 bins. Q: Whats worse than that. A: 17 bins in 1 baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -108

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -132

Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

thumb_up thumb_down +83

how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Whats better than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

thumb_up thumb_down -47

What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

thumb_up thumb_down -101

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

thumb_up thumb_down +140

If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops