The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

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Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

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Women's Rights.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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PATHETIC

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Word play, punch-line, joke.

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Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

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What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

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A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops