How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

How are you this morning?

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

why was the boy sad? his friend got hit by a bus.

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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