How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

What did the white cop say to the black thug? he didn't... he got shot before he could say anything

A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

Who gave Max head georgia Hidi

What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

Whats better than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...