Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

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Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

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What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

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A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

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What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

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How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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