If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

Are you a tree? No.

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

Who gave Max head georgia Hidi

How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

What's brown and sticky? a stick

A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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