Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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when ever i finish a sentence say im a man Me :i met a girl You:im a man Me: i invited her to my place You: im a man Me: we sleept together You:im a man Me:she wisperd in my ear You: im a man

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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