Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

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Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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boobs

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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If a man without hands is called a handicap, what do you call a man without legs? A handicap.

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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