Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

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It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

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A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

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If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

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What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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