Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

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Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

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whats worse than 9/11 a paper cut

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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

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What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

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What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

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Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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Whats better than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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