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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

What do u call a black polar bear? A black bear

What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

What did Scooby Doo say to Shaggy? Raggy

Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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