400 asian people walked in a bar

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Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

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Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

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A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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boobs

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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If a man without hands is called a handicap, what do you call a man without legs? A handicap.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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