A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

boobs

why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

when ever i finish a sentence say im a man Me :i met a girl You:im a man Me: i invited her to my place You: im a man Me: we sleept together You:im a man Me:she wisperd in my ear You: im a man

Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

Why did Suzy's neck hurt? Because it was broken

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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