Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

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why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

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A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

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How do you call a black man? By his first name.

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Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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Jews...

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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