You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

thumb_up thumb_down +31

If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

boobs

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Society.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +118

The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops