Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

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A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

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Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

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There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

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Mexicans are like waffles

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If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

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Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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