A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

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Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

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Why Does God Hate Gays? He Doesent, God Does Not Exist.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

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A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

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How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

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A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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