I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

one day a grape was in the sun raisin

I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

A baby seal walked into a club.

What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

A twelve year old walks into a bar. How Tragic

What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

what would be worse then 9/11 and the holocaust? -if the twin towers fell on a concentration camp

did it hurt when you fell from heaven? cause it looked like you landed on your face

How do you call a black man? By his first name.

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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