what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

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what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

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A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

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How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

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How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

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Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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