What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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boobs

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

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Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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