Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

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what do you call a cow? A cow

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Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

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A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

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one day a grape was in the sun raisin

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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Why did Suzy's neck hurt? Because it was broken

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?"what's up" "A preposition"

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Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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