A baby seal walked into a club.

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why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

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April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station..

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

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Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

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What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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