How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

banana

A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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