roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

What's worse than your mom finding out she has AIDS? After she found out she had AIDS she stormed out of the hospital and got run over by a bus.

What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

?"what's up" "A preposition"

Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

Dont look at me.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

69

What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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