What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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banana

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

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A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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Dont look at me.

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

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Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

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What do u call a black polar bear? A black bear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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