A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

1,984

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

What kind of "room" can you not enter? One with a locked door.

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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