A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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It’s dead.

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I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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An Asian child flunks a test.

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

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How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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69

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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