What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

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How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

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The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

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Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

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Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

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A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

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You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

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A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

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Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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What's brown and sticky? A penis.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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This is a racist joke but who cares!? What is the difference between a black guy and a bag of shit? The bag I apologize to all my fellow black friends. -Lets go MEts

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How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

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Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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