Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

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Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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lol

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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Why did the black man get the grape soda? It was the only soda left.

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What did the redneck say to the Muslim? Nothing, he is too blinded by racial hatred and ignorance after terrorist attacks on the U.S to speak with him despite having common interests, such as baseball.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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