What's brown and sticky? A penis.

The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

That was SOOOOO funny that I laughed!!!!!

Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

A woman's opinion

Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

What never seems to get old? AIDS.

whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

why didn't the drug addict take steroids? he was going to but died due to years of substance abuse

A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

69

" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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