Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Now heres a boy who can't read. Ngjmhgmgk? MTGKMJHGMjhkmjh(hgjnhgfjhgfj nj nvj vj kvnmg ifh) njki nj jo ncj kgjkfngjfk jkn jkgfngkfn gkn kgfnigkfnmg km kgf kglfn kglf kglgkflnm klnm mklm khlgfpnkmfklnmlk mbk lm klgfnmk gfmkngfnkgfklfknm m k kf mkfl m k gflmgkffmkopfdjtorper srhes hngfdlj;sdnht rktrtnr rdpkng ngngf.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

thumb_up thumb_down -24

This is my firstever post so I wanted to make it very specialand have it really mean something, then I though fark that for a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

thumb_up thumb_down -140

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -146

Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Get me a sandwich, bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What's sad about seeing a dead twenty year old lying at the corner of a street with a beer bottle in his hand? A: He owed me twenty bucks.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Test

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops