What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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Why did the black man get the grape soda? It was the only soda left.

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Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

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What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin get in the car.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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What never seems to get old? AIDS.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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hey

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I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

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Surprise mother father (A+)

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Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

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Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops