Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

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What's faster than a black guy with your TV? Probably someone who doesn't have to carry such a heavy object.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

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Q.Want to hear somthing that will never happen A. Sure A. the Houston Astros won a game.

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Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

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Get me a sandwich, bitch

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Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

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Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

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Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

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69

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Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dad drinks a lot Help Me

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Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

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Paige

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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What's black, white and red all over? A zebra carcass

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Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

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What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Bitches Like U Belong In The Zoo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops