- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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A woman's opinion

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

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What do you call a black man that goes to college? A student..

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What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

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The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

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What did the boy get for creating a fantastic AntiJoke? Leukemia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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