Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

What's the square root of four? Two.

Get me a sandwich, bitch

69

Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

^that joke's not funny

Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

What did the redneck say to the Muslim? Nothing, he is too blinded by racial hatred and ignorance after terrorist attacks on the U.S to speak with him despite having common interests, such as baseball.

Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

A woman's opinion

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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