Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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Q.Want to hear somthing that will never happen A. Sure A. the Houston Astros won a game.

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got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Wherever you left it

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How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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Yo momma's so ugly, she decided to get plastic surgery and now has much higher self-esteem.

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Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

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Get me a sandwich, bitch

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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What did the cat say to another ? meow

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Paige

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

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Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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