Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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If a man without hands is called a handicap, what do you call a man without legs? A handicap.

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Penis.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

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why did the black guy win a gold medal in the olympics? hard work, dedication and determanation! what no one else can be bothered to do anymore because of all this new technology and stuff!! get of your arse and do something active. NOW!

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

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Paige

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What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

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I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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