How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

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how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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Japan called... They need help.

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Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

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Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

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What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Not being retarded. - Blake Woodman

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roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

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What's dead? Your mum.

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What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

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How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

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Why was Timmy sad?

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

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what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

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What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

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I have no ideas.

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stop it ryan vallee

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What do you call a thirsty girl? H2Hoe

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what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

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A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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