What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

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What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

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What did the dog say to his owner? Nothing, dogs do not have mouths that are shaped for forming words. Talking would require too many complex movements of the mouth, and since a dog's brain is very small, it would not have the capacity to hold that much information.

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A: Knock Knock! B: No ones home.

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Bin Laden comes out of a cave

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what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

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Pickles

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knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its coop was on fire.

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What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

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What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

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Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

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I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

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Why did my son fall off of his bicycle? Because I hit him with a steak.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas ? Cancer

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops