Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police. There was a severe accident not long ago. Your family are dead.

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If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

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Two rabbits are being chased by dogs and hide in a log in the forest. The male pushes the female to the dogs which are at both sides of the log and gets off Scott free.

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

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How Do You Get Your Mom To Shut up? You Kill Her.

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Steven hawking drives into a bar Disability

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Your mom is so black that her skin tone is darker than most people

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

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Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

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Q. Why did the Muslim go to hell? A. Because his name was Osama Bin laden.

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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Whats fat, brown and on the ground? A chubby indian kid

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Sonic

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im a ginger and i get beat up everyday

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What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

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You know what they say about men with large feet? Large shoes.

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Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

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Where's my shotgun

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How do you kill somebody instantly? Make them smell Smelly mcD's socks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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