A man is walking down the street when a woman asks "excuse me, have you got the time?" to which the man replies "Yes..yes i do" the woman thanks him, and continues with her time constricted shannigans.

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Looks through the peephole.

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Toilet Sex, Toilet Sex I Love Toilet Sex!

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Why are these jokes so funny? Because they're NOT!

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What's worse than dropping your icecream? Slavery

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Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was ferociously raped by a bear.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a genetically disfigured fish please stop pollution.

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Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

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Why is a black man fat? Because he eats a lot.

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A recently engaged couple are having sex. The man finishes in just under 3 minutes as usual. The woman then says "I love you" because they've been together for over 2 years and they care for each other very deeply.

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YOUR MOM JOKES ARE SO OLD because the last time i herd a ur mom joke i fell off my dinosaur...

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Why did the kid start to cry? His parachute didn't open.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second Koala fall out the tree? Hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out the tree? Peer pressure

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Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding, he can't walk.

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe. N

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what kind of panda eats leaves? the gray one :D

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A Rabbi, a Priest, and an Atheist walk into a restaurant. They receive terrible service, and do not leave a tip.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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A hippie gets on a bus and greets the bus driver in a nice fashion Once the bus stops at his bus stop he thanks the bus driver and gets off the bus

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Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

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why did the baby die? It was born with cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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