Women's rights...

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What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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How do you make a fat kid cry? You hold an onion up to their face.

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream..... But Leonardo DiCaprio had a dream within a dream within a dream within a dream.

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ugh good riddance

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What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

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Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

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What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

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I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

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A man was walking on the sidewalk until he saw a bird. He said, "Is that a bird?", and it was a bird.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

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Knock knock Whose there? Interrupting doctor Interr-- You have cancer.

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Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

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whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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