What does the scarecrow from the wizard of oz and a zombie have in common? They both want brains.

What's worse than eating a piece of elephant shit? Eating two pieces of elephant shit.

A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red head were on a plane. They never met, and went their separate ways.

Here's the senario, There are 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara dessert. the question is how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? The awnser is purple because ice cream has no bones.

You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

why did the bear go into the woods to get shot

What do you call a black guy in a prison? A warden. You racist.

Q:Whats worse than 100 babies in 1 dumpster? A:1 dead baby is 100 dumpsters.

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

What is brown and sticky? A Stick

What's the difference between a lawyer and a shark? One is a person and one is a fish. Other than that, not much at all.

Why did the man die from drinking the water? It wasn't water, it was acid.

How come Michael Jackson can draw a perfect circle? He likes little BOYS.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok.

Swiggity Swooty. I'm currently in pursuit for that part of your body people refer to as "booty".

What was the beauty pageant contestant with a bladder control problem told by the judges? You’re an 8.

Why did the person have a scrape on their elbow? Because they fell down.

What dud the dorito say to the other dorito? Nothing. Sorosis are incapable of speaking because they are doritos

There once was a mathematician, a physicist and an engineer in a room without an exit. The ceiling catches fire. They all die.

Why does the Anti-Joke site suck? Because it's not funny.

Q: Why did the plain crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. By: LV

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

A man comes home early from work to find that his wife is in bed with another man, startled by his presence the wife quickly utters 'it's not what it looks like", the husband however, disregards this comment and later files for a divorce

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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