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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Hi Shelby!!

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Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

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Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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So a disabled man walks into a bar...

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

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Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

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How do you put 100 babys in a bucket? A blender

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Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

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cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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F U C K Y O U W I T H Y O U R A N T I J O K E S

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What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

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That's Racist

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So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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How many testicles did Adolph Hitler have? Two.

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Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

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What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

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is mayonnaise an instrument?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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