Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

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Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

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Why Was my mommy gone last night? -cause I ****ed her

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Woman's rights

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Six million.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

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If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

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You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

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How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

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What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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who eats pencils asians

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

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What did Billy get for christmas? Nothing he died of lung cancer.

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how do you spell ugly ? U G L Y.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops