What happened to the guy that stuck his finger up his asshole? It felt GOOOOOOODD

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms

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Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

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Yes, finally caught that mouse!

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How did Danny break his bike? No one really knows. The best probable guess who be a tree fell on it, because Danny and his bike were found under a fallen tree.

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What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? What?

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Knock Knock Who's There Gary Oh hi Gary, come in

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

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Women's football

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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you know what hurts.... PAIN

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2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

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How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

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See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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what did the cancer patient get for christmas. -an amputation. Luckily, he was cured of cancer due to the amputation, but died 3 days later in a tragic car accident

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Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

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Black Veil Brides.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

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What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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