Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

Why, if you are blending a baby, should you put it in feet first? So you can look in to it's eyes when masturbating.

What's worse than getting a detention? Slavery...just kidding that was a good thing!

Your so stupid, that your stupid.

Why did the kid start to cry? His parachute didn't open.

Why did the chick cross the road? He didn't. He was attending his father's funeral, who had been killed earlier that week by an oncoming car as he was crossing the road.

What's the difference between a black man and a bunk bed? A bunk bed is stable and can support two children.

how did the thirteen year old girl get pregnant? she was raped.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Me.

What do you call a strait man that is also gay? Bisexual.

A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

Did you hear about the boy who got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize that he can play it at night too.

Sometimes people get confused when sentences don't end the way they elephant.

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

Halo < COD

What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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