Why was Timmy sad?

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Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

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How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

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If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

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Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

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What do you call a Mexican with a Green Card? A hard working American Citizen

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There are two types of people in this world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

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What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they were both killed in a building collapse.

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

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What's brown and sticky? Poo

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Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and a black person? Ones fun to hit with a baseball bat, and ones a watermelon.

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How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

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How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

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What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

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whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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Nathan Gooderson.

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Unflushed Shit...

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Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down.

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Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops