http://anti-joke.com/

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Why couldnt Jimmy swing on the swing? because Jimmy's a fish

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

What did the lady say to her child? Nothing sadly the baby was taken to Timbuktu by the father. Ps: it's a real place look it up

thumb_up thumb_down +58

A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Knock knock (No one is home)

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops