How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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you know what hurts.... PAIN

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Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

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My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

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a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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democracy

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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That didn't hurt.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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What do you call a former pope. Dead!

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Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

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The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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