Q:How many Jews can you fit in a car? A:Two in the front, two in the back, and however many will fit in the ashtray.

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A guy walks into a bar and says "hey can I get a strong drink" and the bartender says "no we don't allow blacks in this bar" and he was then pushed to the ground and thrown out.

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Why did Little Billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a washing machine.

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has been diagnosed with chronic insomnia.

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What is brown and sticky? A Stick

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Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

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Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Poke her face? No slap her bum!

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What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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What's worse then being HIV positive? Catching the cold the next day.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt. He actually got halfway across the road and was struck by a fast moving car. There is now a memorial on the side of the road mourning his death...

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What is Earth made out of? Earth

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where do cows go on dates? the slaughter house

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what did the dead woman say the boy? I am dead.

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what is stupid and reading this you

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Why couldnt i think of an anti-joke? cuz i was too high and a fly distracted me

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What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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What do we want? Chips!! When do we want them? Chips

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Boob Top view B Front view oo Side view b

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A: Knock knock. B: <>

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What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

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What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

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knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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