Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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what did the crippled boy get for christmas? cancer.

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What do you call a lettuce named Andrew? Andrew.

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Roses are red violets are blue whats the opposite of skiny again cause i think that's you

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Q- Whats The Difference Between a Jew and a TV Dinner? A- One Gets Cooked in the Oven and the other is a TV Dinner!

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why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

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what did the scientist say in Siberia? burrrrrrrrrrilium

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This is "Eliza" holy shit! I almost gave up and went to a party assuming you guys had simply skipped the reply. Please tell me nothing of this is written in code, because I have no fucking idea how to decipher it... ...To think that so few consider Nero a hero for all that he has done, and so many have come to hate him and still follow his advice basically abusing him. I told my sister to use mom`s cellphone to call and warn as many as possible, telling them to spread the word, is Nero7 Going to make it? He mentioned a barfight starting over nothing during new years eve. I know that some of the members where planning to use his own teachings in order to overthrow him, I warned him but he was fully aware already but did nothing for some reason. Yet none of them have the assets to do anything like this... Should I start calling all those members that left during Nero7`s "sudden paranoia period?" Many of them have political authority and can be of help if we can somehow convince them. Respond Asap, and if Nero7 is in a public hospital, then get him the hell out of there, he is an exposed target for anyone, if he gets killed, ill fucking kill you you hear me!

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Why did John scream when he came in to his bedroom? He stepped on a nail

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What does the scarecrow from the wizard of oz and a zombie have in common? They both want brains.

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What do you sit on, sleep on and brush your teeth with? A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush

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Wanna hear a joke? My penis size.

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what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

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Rock mattress.

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There was a dedicates Muslim man on a plane. He was travelling to Melbourne for a business conference so he could help support his family as well as he can.

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1 what do gay horses eat? 2 hayyyy 1 no horse dick

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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What's flatter than a pancake? The baby I just ran over.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he dropped his phone fell in.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

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Doctor, doctor! I think I'm a pair of curtains... Well don't worry, you've come to the right place. We'll get you the help you need.

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What was the biggest party of 2010? The Democrats.

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Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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