A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Animal control.

What's green and has wheels? A chinese race car driver.

Why did the black man swim across the lake? He didnt. He drowned

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Chuck Norris. Alright come in.

did you know the leading cause of funerals is death?

I am awesome, you are not, i am awesome, you smoke pot!

Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

Whats worse than finding a black man in your bed? After you sleep with him, he tells you he has AIDS.

What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

What is black, white, and red all over? A domino dipped in kitten blood.

Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

You might be a redneck if you are a an uneducated white farm laborer from the south.

who hooked up with Sinead Walker? • Liam Findlay

Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

What did Batman say to Robin befor they got in the car? Get in the car.

man: so where did you two meet? man tied to flower: in the produce section.

Lil' Wayne

What's Worse then an apple with a worm? The holocaust

What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...