A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

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who hooked up with Sinead Walker? • Liam Findlay

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin... Nothing they are muffins.

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A jewish man is sitting on a bench. A german man then proceeds to sit down next to him. They say nothing to each other.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

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man: so where did you two meet? man tied to flower: in the produce section.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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When I went on this website for the first time with a few friends, I was surprised to see a lot of these jokes were actually capable of making me laugh. But as I read on, eventually those funny, harmless jokes turned into offensive, ignorant, and very absurd statements. I realize that this 'anti joke' website was most likely created by a bunch of white people, because obviously white people are one of the most racest human beings, but all this is just too much! I guess I'm trying to say: if your going to make a joke, be respectful about it. America has gone through a lot of unforgiveable hardships and unfortunately these 'jokes' are making fun of all of that in a very offensive way.

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Why did the math teacher cry during 6th period? He was held at gunpoint.

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Why couldnt Jimmy swing on the swing? because Jimmy's a fish

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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What's blue and can't have sex? A blueberry

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What is this a book??!!! What am I supposed to do...... READ IT?????!!!!!!!!!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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What do you call a black man that is working on a farm? A farmer.

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roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

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why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

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A horse walks into a bar the bar tender says hey you cant be in here you are a horse so the horse leaves.

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Ask me if I´m an orange. Are you an orange? No I? a person.

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The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

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A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

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What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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