Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

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A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You set her on fire.

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doctor, help! My hair is falling out! I need something to keep it in!" The doctor says, "sure. Here's some medicine."

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Why Was a guy wearing Pink pants? Because He Was Gay.

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Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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Q: What do starving children in Africa eat? A: Nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

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BOOBIES!!!!!!!

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Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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wheres a good place to find funny jokes? anti-joke.com

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What did the bird say to the squirrel? Chirp

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

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Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

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Kah-________-

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what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

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Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

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Q. Why did the monster have eight legs? A. I don't know.

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Larry: Why did the chick cross the road? Jeff: Chick? Don't you mean chicken? Larry: Just answer the question. Jeff: Um, why? Larry: Wrong.

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How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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planking.

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What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops