A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and a black person? Ones fun to hit with a baseball bat, and ones a watermelon.

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Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

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So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

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What sucks?

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? As this question does not provide neccesary information, a plausible answer cannot be found.

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Hellen Keller

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Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

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What do you call a former pope. Dead!

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What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

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what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

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You know what's never heard of? Father's Day in Camden.

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What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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How do u shit With ur ass

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why did the painter cry? he didnt have any paint left...

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Why did the black guy smell so bad? Because he accidently jumped into a pool of garbage disposal.

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

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When does a blond laugh and cry? When she's raped by a clown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops