"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

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What's big and purple? Something that's big and purple

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Knock knock (No one is home)

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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There is this dylectic who can't spell.

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Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

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Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

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What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

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Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

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What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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Do you know what a deaf guy says to a blind guy? God told me you'll see your path.

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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