h

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How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

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Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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Friends are like trees. They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

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Adolf Hitler was a humanitarian.

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What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

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Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

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roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs? A: Probably right where you left him, since animals with no appendages have no way of mobility

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Why was the Black man Running? Because he was trying to get in shape for the Olympics.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

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skjer;nf;oashfaefaohesf oiqeshLACLAHN IS SUTRP SD] make it shorett and swert

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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The Charlotte bobcats.

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops