Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you make a Mexican parade? Contact members of the Latin community and inform them of your wish to organize a parade celebrating their heritage.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Tennesse

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Cassie Mills you are gay stop being silly in class you're not funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

thumb_up thumb_down +14

SC Johnson a Family Company

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +12

is mayonnaise an instrument?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how many gay men can you fit on a barstool 1

thumb_up thumb_down +12

wHY DID WILLIAM CHEUNG LICK THE BERILLIAM FUNG, BECause it was fun!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats pale and white your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your mom is so ugly that your father married her because of emotional, spiritual, and intellectual compatibility, not because of sexual attraction.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

thumb_up thumb_down +10

If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

thumb_up thumb_down +10

-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops