How do you kill a retard? Slit his throat.

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Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

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Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a large refrigerator Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? The two of them were stapled together Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

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flip flop chop, clip clop cow, POW. hahahahahah. :).

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How do you get them out? Tortilla chips

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your mom is so lesbian that in prder to have you she planted a seed in her vagina because she refused to have sex with a man

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Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

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Why couldn't the boy see his sick mother? Because he was blind

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What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

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What's a ghost favourite colour? Ghosts don't exist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because i was keeping his family at gun-point on the other side.

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Du bist mein Kampf

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What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

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nock nock who's there i eat mop i eat mop ho i didn't know you eat your poo. the wedding is off and go **** yourself in a hole!!

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Why did the black man die? Why didn't the black man die?

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What is funnier than a barrel full of clowns? The holocaust.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its coop was on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops