Q: How do you get a jewish girls number? A: You roll up her sleeve

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Two black guys walk into a bar and arrest the under age drinkers

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A day without sunshine is like night.

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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A white man and a black woman run for president The Black woman received 65% of all woman votes, 75% of all Hispanics and 99% of all black votes. The White man still won, and was a great president.

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What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

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The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

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What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

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roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

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a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

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Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

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What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

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Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

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John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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What's worse than your mother dying in a car crash? Your father dying in the same crash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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