how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Looks through the peephole.

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Roses are bacon Violets are red I have a gun I'm not very original.

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What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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why did the painter cry? he didnt have any paint left...

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Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

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A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

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What do you get if your mailman drops your letter in black paint? Blackmail

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Left. That one direction...

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There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

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What did the lion say to the octopus? Nothing, lions can't talk, and even if they did the chances of a lion and octopus meeting are very slim.

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What do you give a Penn State waterboy for Halloween - Candy

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What did the dog say to the human. "Woof."

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Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

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theres safety in numbers? tell that to 6 million jews

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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