How do you get them out? Tortilla chips

Q:whats yellow and flys through walls A:A magical Banana

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

Thank you for booking with Anti-Joke Travel Agency. Here is your trip itinerary: 1. Your toilet

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

minced oaths

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because i was keeping his family at gun-point on the other side.

why did hannibal lector butter up the teacher? he wanted to get a good grade. he also wanted to eat her

Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

Why dose not the cat bark? Because it's a cat!

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

1234 5

what's worse than one scoop of ice crea falling on the floor? - the holocaust what's worse than two scoops of ice cream falling on the floor? - nothing

whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

What do you call a Jew on a rollercoaster? A Jew on a rollercoaster.

What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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