What's white and can't climb a tree? A refridgerator What's white heavy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A polar bear

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You throw nothing like your mother; she is actually really good at throwing.

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Why did the boy hate his bicycle and soccer ball he got for Christmas? The boy didn't have legs. He also hated sports. By the way he was black but that doesn't matter, he still hated sports. Who in the right mind would give a cripple inappropriate toys? Probably a racist Santa Claus. Oh by the way, Santa Claus is not real. So did they return the presents after the boy found out what it was? Yes, and it turns out the boy got a guitar and piano instead. Too bad the boy is also deaf.

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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Knock, knock. Come in!

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock WHAT THE F*** DO YOU WANT?!?!?!?! Oh, well then nevermind

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What did one cupcake say to the other cupcake? I want to eat you.

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Q. Why did the man fall off his bike? A. He was hit by a canoe.

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what was sad about six black guys driving off a cliff in a cadallac? They were my friends

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How many teenagers does it take to change a light? 1. Unless he has some sort of disablity then probably 2.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing because muffins can't talk. The other muffin replied, 'What an odd conversation starter!'

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whats worse then a paper cut, the holocaust, whats worse then the holocaust, two paper cuts

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Obama-Care

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weiner? balls

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How do you keep a blonde occupied for hours? Put on an entertaining movie.

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An illegal Mexican immargrant was deported for the selling an use of marijuana. the sad part is this happens everyday

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Whats the difference between a van with a bunch of babies in the back and a Cadillac with a bunch of babies in the back I don't have a Cadillac in my garage

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Why was the kid underwater? He hit a rock.

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Q:What kind of pizza did the World Trade Center order? A:Two Plains

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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