what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Plenty of things but you already knew that.

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A man walks in to a bar, the bartender asks "what will it be?" The man says i don't know, what will it be?"

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What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Fvck this poem I'll just go play video games.

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What does a kangaroo and a zucchini have in common? Neither one can ride a bike.

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a Jew? Boyscouts come back from camp.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

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what did the Mexican fire fighter name his two kids? Jose and Josbe

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why did phil ruin the patio furniture? because he wasnt familiar with the grammar technique used

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A dead guy laying on the floor holding a gun and a knife. What killed him? cancer.

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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How many arabs can fit in a 2007 honda accord? legally up to 5

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What doesn't kill you makes you...... A paraplegic

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What did the blind, deaf, mute child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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josh roberts goes into churches and forces them to listen and go by his religious opinion until they cry

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Jumped.

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A fat mexican man runs a marathon. Later, he is hit by a bus and raped by a squirrel.

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I am just not using any mentalism nor any of those techniques anymore that is all, is it alright if I call you now?

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A man and a prostitute walk into a bar. they have a few drinks then proceed to a hotel room where the man has sexual intercourse with the woman in exchange for money. The man then leaves while the woman stays in the hotel room and cries cause she hadn't achieved any of her dreams or life ambitions.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Wait your turn patiently.

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Why is the world flat? I don't know ask the Native American who was curious enough to take his canoe, go out into the middle of the water and never come back.

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What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? nothing he ain't already told her twice....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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