How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Granny -You don't sound like Granny... -Just let me in little boy. -MOM!!!!!

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What's white and sticky? Glue

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Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

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a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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What is brown, smells like shit and on fire? A muslim after the bomb vest malfuctioned!

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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What's a thither? My sister with a lisp.

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What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

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If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? During the crossover episode of Blossom and Star Trek: Voyager. Six traveled ahead to the distant future and found herself on the aforementioned starship. Her situation was confusing and frightening, even more so when the half-female, half-Borg appeared before her.

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obama is a good president

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Hey

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

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Q: how do you get a man with one arm out of a tree? A: shoot him

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Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

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whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

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What do Chuck Norris and Oprah Winfrey have in common? They are both white, male, good actors, white, rich, and white. Except for the eagle.

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-What's a real anti joke? -This.

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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