Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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What did the blind, deaf rabbit get for Easter? . . . Eaten by a by a lion.

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Golf.

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A Jew, a lesbian, and an Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender then cards them and sends them out because they're all under 21.

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

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Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

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Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

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-Knock knock -Come on in!

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

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What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play.

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Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

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What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

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Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

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Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops