What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

How many doctors does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

What do you find....... there's a..........

Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

Why couldn't the college student get on the internet? He can't afford a computer.

Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

jacobs 1inch gets matt. t in 4 seconds

69

-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

What is the best thing about having sex with twenty-seven year old's? There's twenty of them

Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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