roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

A dancer walks into a barre

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

A Hispanic man, an African woman, and a Caucasian man walk into a bar. No one wins this round of "Racial Equality Appreciation Day's" game of limbo.

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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