What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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