What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A black man walks out of a police station

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops