What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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What's blue and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath

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Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

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Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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Want to hear a dirty joke? The horse fell in the mud

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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