Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops