Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

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Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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