If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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