Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...