Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

God is real.

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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