Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

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What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

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What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

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Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

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What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

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A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

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How many sumo wrestlers does it take to lift a huge rock? The point of lifting a rock just to lift a rock is stupid, so why would you get 3 sumo wrestlers to come out and waste their time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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