Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

If you pull a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back? I need a quick answer for this question.

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

A man walks into a bar. Another man becomes the Limbo State Champion.

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer was depressed about the low business and farmer's economy, so he poured gasoline all over himself and lit a match. The barn burned down and the chicken was the only survivor.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

a man dyslexic into bar walks a

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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