Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

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When does Adolf Hitler get horny? When his hormones start at it when looking at women.

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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So two men were drinking beer and one asks "Why are you so sad today, Lenny?" The other man replies "Because I was just diagnosed leukemia." Four days later Lenny dies and his body was buried at Cherryhill Cemetery where his family mourned over his death.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

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What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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