Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

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whats brown and sticky? Doody

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Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

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Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

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Three Jew begin to walk down the street, they then pursue walking and purchase many goodies from vendors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops