why did the man fall off his unicycle? because he was dead

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

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Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

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Two baby seals walk into a club.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

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Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

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I'm Polish.

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

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Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. It is an avian species incapable of throwing such a heavy material as wood.

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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