so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

Your mother is so poor that she has to rely on government sent cheques to sustain a basic lifestyle.

Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

Who looks like a bird and can fly to hogwarts? Dean McKee. his scar is f u c k i n g rotten

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 sodomized his whole family.;

How do you stop a black kid from hanging around in your back yard? Hang him in the front yard.

Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

What's worse than finding an apple in your worm... I mean, a worm in your apple ? "Then I took an arrow to the knee" jokes.

Just because you do not see the joke, it does`t mean its not here... Ps: It helps us get hookers and beers while wasting your "valuable time" OMG PLEASE BE FUCKING UNDERSTANDING OHMYLAWD!!!!!!!!! Ps: Cry harder you greedy sons of shedogs

A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

This ones for the dudes: Whats worse then having sex with a woman with no penis? Having se with a man

cool

Do you play piano? No

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...