jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the little girl cry? The little girl cried for mercy as her attackers violated every inch of her innocent body, tearing her up from the inside until her organs were forced out of her anus and blood squirted from her ears as the pressure inside her body exceeded to a maximum. After the attackers were done with the corpse, they cut off her limbs and stapled them to her head.They placed her now decomposing body on the front porch of the worried parents' house and rang the doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

thumb_up thumb_down -27

like this or you will die at some point in your life

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what did the guy say on friday ? ah man im so glad its not monday tuesday wednesday thursday friday saturday sunday he then threw a horse at a plane while moonwalking on a star that was riding a duck that was on a rabbit. Sir jumpalot was working overtime as he had to pay for a free phone

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Say, "I have a really nice knock knock joke, but you have to start." To someone. They say knock knock You say who's there! and walk away.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

thumb_up thumb_down -29

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops