A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

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Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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Banana Hamock.

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

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Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

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Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

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Why was the clown sad? Because he was found guilty of raping and murdering 33 young men, and sentenced to death for 12 of those murders by a jury of his piers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops