Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

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what is red white and blue? the french flag

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What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

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Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

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what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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