What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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Why did Sally fall off her swing? -she had no arms knock knock whos there not Sally

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What colour is a black man in a freezer black

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

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The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

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i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

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A young baby died.

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Why was the boy laughing? Because

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

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Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops