Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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whats black and goes to newy high Manyiel

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Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

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AIDS

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Coke or Pepsi? Trick question, beer.

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Knock knock Who's there? Isabelle Isabelle who? Isabelle Williams Oh hi Isabelle come in

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? It's funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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A friend? Just a friend that you told to stop pretending to be me? And you had no idea whatsoever that I am Nero as in not one of the six hundred thousand wabbabes?

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What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

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An older man and a young boy are holding hands and walking into the woods together. The boy looks up and say, "gee, I'm scared, it's dark in there." the old man answers, "Yeah, just think how I feel....I have to walk out of here alone!"

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What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Funeral... You can't spell it without FUN

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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osama is obame quincadence or aluminatti????

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Why did the black man commit suicide? Because he was killed by a white cop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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