Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Where's the soap?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mom's so fat, she's is bigger than the average person.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the boy die? because he got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How did the rabbi die? It didnt it lived through the shooting

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? answer: Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops