Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What is better than getting a job? Getting a better job.

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What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

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What's big and long? My dick.

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Roses are red..... violets are blue...... I have a gun get in the van

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 ? : Because 7 8 9

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Why does a woman with a little dark skin and black hair a Native American? Because she smells.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

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SUCK MY 29 AND A HALF FOOT LONG DICK BITCH JUST KIDDING............ IT IS 69 FEET LONG GIGADY

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what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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Yo mamas so fat,you know wht, i think she might die !!

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Will I be watching The Voice tonight? no.

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I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley, I live next door.

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WOw you have no life

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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