If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm bitten in half in your apple.

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Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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A black man, a Mexican man, a white man, an Asian man, a priest, a rabbi, and a prostitute walk into a bar. It was a very popular bar.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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