What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

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Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

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Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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