An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Roses are chickens violets are pizza this poem makes no sense, Refridgerator

What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

Kevin+Sean sitting in a tree enjoying mcdonald's free wifi.

Why don't jews believe in Jesus Because jews believe Jesus Christ was not their savior

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

Why was the blonde staring at the bottle of orange juice? She was reading the nutrition facts, as she was trying to watch her weight.

why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

Why was New Zealand attacked by Australia? New Zealand attacked Australia due to a teritorial dispute. The war lasted for 3 years with over 150000 deaths.

You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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