Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

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Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

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In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Houlocaust. What's worse than the Houlocaust? Nothing, the Haulocaust was one of the most horrible instances of inhumanity in recorded history.

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whats black and hangs from my tree my neighbor

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What is blue and roles about on the floor A baby playing with a plastic sack

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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Knock Knock who's there? ... who's there?!?!?! ... WHO'S THERE ?!?!?!? ... stupid kids.

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A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

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What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have AIDS.

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Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? The eventual extinction of humanity, followed by the death of the universe.

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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