How many pianos does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to change the lightbulb, and one to play a motivational tune.

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why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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What is the meaning of life? Definitions of life on the Web: a characteristic state or mode of living; "social life"; "city life"; "real life" the experience of being alive; the course of human events and activities; "he could no longer cope with the complexities of life" the course of existence of an individual; the actions and events that occur in living; "he hoped for a new life in Australia"; "he wanted to live his own life without interference from others" animation: the condition of living or the state of being alive; "while there's life there's hope"; "life depends on many chemical and physical processes" the period during which something is functional (as between birth and death); "the battery had a short life"; "he lived a long and happy life" the period between birth and the present time; "I have known him all his life" the period from the present until death; "he appointed himself emperor for life" a living person; "his heroism saved a life" liveliness: animation and energy in action or expression; "it was a heavy play and the actors tried in vain to give life to it" living things collectively; "the oceans are teeming with life" the organic phenomenon that distinguishes living organisms from nonliving ones; "there is no life on the moon" biography: an account of the series of events making up a person's life a motive for living; "pottery was his life"

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Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

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Niall Horan

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Q. What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A. A gay bar

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why are anti-jokes so funny? they aren't. they're stupid.

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Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

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What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

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How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

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What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

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Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

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A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

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what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

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I love you

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What did the doctor say to the pregnant mother? Your babies dead

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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