What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

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How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

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2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

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Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

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What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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What is big, round, hairy, black with a little bit of white and red stripes, large feet, small hands, squinty eyes and a purple beret? Nothing. How ridiculous.

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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How many blodnes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Approximately 17. with the addition of 6 brunettes.

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1 white girl and 2 black men -TRAGIC

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

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I was walking down a railway line the other day... I was fined £1000

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Do you know why the kid jumped down the 50 foot hole? I dont know, jump in and ask him.

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Why did the plane crash? because there were two towers in front of it.

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you give like i give lomain

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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