a blind man walks into a bar it hurt.

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

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Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

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Emo Girl: Whats Your Favorite song? Regulor Girl: Something Carrie Underwood sing!(: Emo Girl: Are you retarted? Regulor Girl: Well im not the one who loves Emos .-. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Honstley, I didnt right this my cousin told me to wriget this... i think its stupied... And Yes, Ima Emo but im not trying to judge people if there emo or not! :D Luv ya! -Angel- <3

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

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What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

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Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

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i was molested.

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

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I've got a boner

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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