Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

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A man rubs a magic lamp nothing happens

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

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A man walks into a store and asks for a loaf of bread.

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what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

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Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

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A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

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After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

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How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

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Q: Why MohammadReza Is a Bitch? A: Because he isnt a whore

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Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

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Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

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(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

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what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

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Whats Obama's last name?

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops