sometimes i take my duck a shower, i always use cold water because if i use hot water it will think im cooking it.

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How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

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Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

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whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

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Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

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what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

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Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

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hi.... bonjour... hola... DOOO YOUUUU UNDERSTANDDD MEEE !!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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what did batman tell robin before they got into the batmobile? -let's get in the batmobile!

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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