Why did the girl drown? Well, the girl probably did drown because she was within the ages of 3-5 years old, and she probably had a physical incapapbilty and she could not swim so her parents didn't save her.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

go stand in a mirror look at your face that is the joke. 8- now go tell someone you will tell them a joke and do that to them this will be a fast spreading joke. jkjk this joke is so bad everybody give this alot of bad thums. ha ha i do not care

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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