A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

Mum: Never put off for tomorrow what can be done today. Child: Oh, I was going to play video games tomorrow, so...

The pig walks up to the buture the' The buture sloters him!

Roses are red violets are blue poems don't have to rhyme..... Refrigerator

Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

go stand in a mirror look at your face that is the joke. 8- now go tell someone you will tell them a joke and do that to them this will be a fast spreading joke. jkjk this joke is so bad everybody give this alot of bad thums. ha ha i do not care

lets see how many dislikes i can get from this...

There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

Two blondes are sitting in a car. They took a drive and later enjoyed turkey sandwiches at the local eatery.

whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

What?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

What did John F. Kennedy say to Kurt Cobain? Nothing. They never met.

My mom told me about a funnel they make for women now that they can use to pee standing up. I told her it was a ploy to promote feminism.

A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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