A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The owner of the horse then explains the evolution of the species and genetics. The bartender, satisfied, serves the owner a drink and gladly gives the horse water.

Whats the difference between and anti joke and a joke? There two different things.

go stand in a mirror look at your face that is the joke. 8- now go tell someone you will tell them a joke and do that to them this will be a fast spreading joke. jkjk this joke is so bad everybody give this alot of bad thums. ha ha i do not care

Two blondes are sitting in a car. They took a drive and later enjoyed turkey sandwiches at the local eatery.

There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he lives in a chicken coop and has never even seen a road.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

I've got a boner

What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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