Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

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What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

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What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? This isn't a car

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Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

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Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

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Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

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Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

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How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

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what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

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How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Can people stop posting grammatically incorrect jokes on here. Half of the sentences do not make sense.

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what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The owner of the horse then explains the evolution of the species and genetics. The bartender, satisfied, serves the owner a drink and gladly gives the horse water.

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

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Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

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What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

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Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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