teacher: what comes after 69? johnny: mouthwash teacher: get out.

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(insert antijoke here

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Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

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i did not type this on 12/23/11 at 8:49:47

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

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Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What did zero say to ten? I see you found someone

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Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to rape him.

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What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

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yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

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I've got a boner

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

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poop.

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Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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