What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

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A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

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When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Lean a ladder against the tree and reassure them if they are apprehensive.

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how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The owner of the horse then explains the evolution of the species and genetics. The bartender, satisfied, serves the owner a drink and gladly gives the horse water.

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-Is Michael Jackson dead? - HELL YEAH HE'S DEAD!!

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whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

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Two blondes are sitting in a car. They took a drive and later enjoyed turkey sandwiches at the local eatery.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he lives in a chicken coop and has never even seen a road.

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What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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What?

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Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

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how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

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a Jew had a small nose

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Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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