Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

How do you put on a condom Very Carefully

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

GIVE

Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

A 55-year-old white man's car is broken, so he decides to take a bus to work that morning. His bus arrives and he gets on. Then he notices the driver's a woman. He pays for his ticket, takes a seat by the window and in about an hour he gets to his office.

Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

A French, an American and a Belgian are going together on holidays. I hope they'll have good weather.

A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

What's black without keys. A keyboard after you hit it with a shovel.

Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

Whut r bacer dew? Eh muphin

Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

Emo Girl: Whats Your Favorite song? Regulor Girl: Something Carrie Underwood sing!(: Emo Girl: Are you retarted? Regulor Girl: Well im not the one who loves Emos .-. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Honstley, I didnt right this my cousin told me to wriget this... i think its stupied... And Yes, Ima Emo but im not trying to judge people if there emo or not! :D Luv ya! -Angel- <3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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