Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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Two blondes are sitting in a car. They took a drive and later enjoyed turkey sandwiches at the local eatery.

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A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

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Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "How'd you open the door?"

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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Women's Rights

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i said wut wut in the butt!

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A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

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When life gets you down, make a comforter.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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once upon a time jeff peterson was taking a daily walk when he stops and stares at a strange object. it was an assasin with a knife who slaughtered jeff decapitating his head while his family cry's. THE END

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What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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