Why did the U.S.A. vote in a black president? Because racial prejudice is a thing of the past and the U.S.A. is a liberal and progressive nation.

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

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What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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The pig walks up to the buture the' The buture sloters him!

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How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

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What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

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make me a sandwich!

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GIVE

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someone called a frog a frog

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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teacher: what comes after 69? johnny: mouthwash teacher: get out.

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A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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What did the cop say to the robber? You have the right to remain silent

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What's the difference between a bird and a horse? - Both can fly, exept the horse.

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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What's black without keys. A keyboard after you hit it with a shovel.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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