What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuble prizes.

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why cant monkeys swim? cause they dont have staberlizers.

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Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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Your friend is so gay, he has consensual sex with other men. and enjoys it.

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Which square is small and yellow? The small, yellow square.

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Chuck Norris didn't rape yo mama, yo mama raped chuck norris!

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Knock, knock! Who's there? your enemy your enemy who? your nemesis who was brutally raped and murdered last nigh.

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I'm a raging homosexual.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

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Guy 1: Hey, do you like fish sticks? Guy2: Yeah. Guy 1: Me too

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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What do you call a black man who walks into a jail cell? A hard working and dedicated police officer who was just putting his first offender in jail.

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What do u call an anorexic with a yeast infection? -a quarter pounder with cheese. (not really anti-joke, im a girl and thought this was funny lol)

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whats hard, its not what you think a penis

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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yo mamas like a spider always getting wrapped up in her own cu*

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -Fish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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