Why can't Kevin run with scissors? Because he killed himself.

What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

What did zero say to ten? I see you found someone

women's rights

What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

Aodhan Hearty

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

Women's rights

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having a Hippo give you head.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

Why did the maid have to clean feces off the wall? Because I shit cannoned it.

Whats funny about a kid with down syndrome q: a lot of things, like his face

How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

What's white and gluey Glue

How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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