What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm only 13 so if you have sex with me it's illegal.

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knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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It gets very hot in Mianus, Connecticut

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Whu did the boy drop his cheeseburger? Because the school janitor whacked him with a mallet.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? The list goes on.

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why did the Japanese boy drop his ice cream ? Because he was hit by a building.

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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So a blonde, brunete, and red head are all on the side of the road for prostitution. so a man walks up to the red head with money. she takes it and runs off. a man goes up to the bruenete and hands her money, but she also takes it and runs. so a man walks up to the blond with money and she says "wait...we get paid to do this?"

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why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

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why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

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What's long and hard and looks like plastic? A plastic baton.

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Whats the worst part of your school burning down? A: The burnt pizza.

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Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

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How do you kill a deer? You don't, you just let it be because that's what a decent human being would do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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