How many monkeys can play COD at once? It depends on how many controllers you have.

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kevin kim

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"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

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A schizophrenic man walks into a bar. He has split personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

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A newborn, an infant, a teenager, a person in their 20s, a person in the 40s, a person in their 60s, a person in their 70s, a person in their 80s, and a little old lady who is about 105 walk into a bar. Wait, infants can't walk.

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i like my coffee like i like my women... Without a penis

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Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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Let's not pick mushrooms in heaven.

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In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

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what is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? one has to deal with a butt

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Q: What used to be black, and then became white, and touches young boys? A: Michael Jackson.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

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A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

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What do you call a burger made from children with Aspbergers? Cannibalism

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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Q: whats a bunny's favorite music genre A: smooth jazz

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What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

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What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

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A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

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whats sad about 3 black people driving a Cadillac over a cliff? that was my Cadillac

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What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops