What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

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What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

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What did the dead baby say to horse? Nothing, it was dead

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What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 eight 9

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if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A BRICK!!

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Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

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Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing, but he did purchase whiskey with the little money he had to drink away his misery, and to suppress his suicidal thoughts that were a result of his alcoholism which stemmed from his father's abusive nature.

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A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

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what do abortion and a coat hanger have in common? they both contain 4 vowels

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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out of your comfort zone

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I have an erection My mom!

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MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

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Whats worse than finding a giant spider in your bedroom? Loosing it...

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BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD COPENHAGEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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