What do Gary Glitter and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both successful pop stars

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How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

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I love you

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Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

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why did the boy die because he got ran over by a tractor

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the gas man, I've come to read your meter, like we arranged.

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What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

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Q. You know what sucks A. Being an orphan

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

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HA HA HA HA HAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHYHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA - Bomber

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What's hard and straight going in, and soft and sticky coming out? chewing gum

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? What are you doing here?

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

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Never tell Alzheimer's jokes to old people. They will not remember them.

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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What happened to Liam? He Died.

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I have a gay camel

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I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

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Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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What starts with E and ends with lephant? Not giraffe

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How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

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If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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