If I could rearrange the alphabet I probably wouldn't.

In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

Two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffins says "God its hot in here." The other muffin screams "AHHHH talking muffin!!!!"

Why did the five year old leprosy survivor fall out of the tree? She had no arms, they had to be amputated.

An englishman, Irishman and scottishman are standing on the side of a cliff. The Irishman and englishman both jump off the cliff. The scottishman says "oh,shit".

You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

There was a blonde, brunette and a red head on an island. The blond was on holiday, the brunette lived there and the red head was there on business, it was a very large and industrial island.

Why did? Yes

what do you call a black man flying a plane?? a pilot ,you racist!

What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a person of Jewish descent and the other is a device for traversing waterways akin to the raft.

Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

What's the difference between a black guy and a door? Various answers are acceptable. The door has hinges, a black guy has legs, etc.

What's big and fat? An obese man.

whats better than sex? cookies

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

Equal rights!

Q. Why was the dad sad? A.His favorite team lost in the championship.

My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

Q:Why did the dog jump over the fence A:Because he could

Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...