- Anti Joke

two friends are hanging out, one says to the other "whats 5 plus 5" the other says, "you know i didnt finish school and i dont appriceate you making fun of me" the other boy looks away and walks off

Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

have you ever tasted ethiopian food? ..... neither have they

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

Why was the boy not feeling well? He swallowed a piano.

what has hair? Organisms, or at least most do.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

Q: Why did the rich Wallstreet business man move into Harlem? A: Because sex offenders weren't welcome anywhere else.

Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

What's the difference between Mike Tyson and Anna Nicole Smith? Mike Tyson's not dead.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

Why did Billy fall off the tree? Why? Because he had no arms or legs. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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