How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

whats 2+2? 1

Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

A man walks into the doctors and he says to the doctor 'my leg hurts when I poke it like this'. The doctor replies 'don't poke it like that then'.

Call or text this number and say whatever 863-670-1547 or you can mail things to his house 252 village crest court lakeland florida 33809

Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

What did the Catholic Priest say to the little boy? May God be with you.

What is worse than getting a virus on your computer? Having your mother die of malaria

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

why are chickens dying so fast? because black people are hungry.

You know what's gay?? Lesbians

Q: Why did the Jew have to go to the Holocaust A: Because he was Jewish

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

LMFAO - "WE runnin' through these hoes like Drano?" Is that really what society has sunken to? Is this really what is accepted? Is this what we are jamming into children's moralities? Society is Screwed!

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette was stranded on a deserted island. A genie appeared and said nothing, because genies doesn't exist

what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

Life is like a bridge. You get walked on all your life until you fall apart.

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other-side

Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...