Q: How do you stop a Mexican tank? A: Ask politely.

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Little Miss Muffett sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey along came her food allergies and she died

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If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

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What do you call a joke that isn't funny? A joke that isn't funny.

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whoes considered the best trackstar in the world. the random jamacan who ran onto the field.

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What's funnier than a fat person falling nothing is

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm black give me money

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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What's sad about 4 people in a Lamborgini going over a cliff? It was my car.

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Why did the rabbit jump? Because that's what rabbits do.

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Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

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Hi rebecca , its me that guy over there. purple moneky blue dishwasher. aka JUMANJIIII

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What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

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A train poops its pants.

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Im black

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Knock knock Who's there? Hector Hector who? ....I forgot the rest of the joke but your mom is a whore.

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What's big, white, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.?

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why did the 11 year old boy stick his hand in a lawnmower nobody knows he hasnt come out of the coma yet

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Libyans stage a protest. They get massacred.

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Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

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What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

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Knock knock. Come in.

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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Why doesn't the fat kid have any friends? Because he is fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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