There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

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What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

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your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

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What's worse then ten dead babies being nailed to a tree? Being the one to take them down.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

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Is you refrigerator running? That's odd you should call the cops about that one!

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What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

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How do all Asians look? With their eyes.

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What's the difference between a truckload of dead babies and a truckload of bowling balls? You can't unload the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

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What is worse then a worm in your apple? 2 worms in your apple.

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Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a man holding a shotgun was chasing him

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i put the STD in S.T.u.D all i need is U!!! F_CK all i need is U!!!!!!! o.0 lolzzz

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"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

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Yo mommas so fat that when people look at her they say things like "shes bigger than me"

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Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

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Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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A dyslexic man walks into a building labeled, Bra. He then thinks he has found heaven but is suprised when all that is served is beer, not milk.

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What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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