Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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What did the dad do immediately do after his child died? Cleaned off the knife.

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There was a dedicates Muslim man on a plane. He was travelling to Melbourne for a business conference so he could help support his family as well as he can.

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Have you heard the joke that they don't tell retarded people? You haven't? Well then alright let me tell you because it's actually quite amusing.

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a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

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Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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The 19th Amendment

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

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Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

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whos the biggest oaf................................ coasta

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Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

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Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

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Why did the gecko cross the road.... Because he saw great deals on car insurance!!!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

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Where's my shotgun

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What's long and black? A black hockey stick.

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

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How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

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What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

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Well You're Full Of It . -Full Of What ? Well , Probably Blood And Other Organs You Can't Live Without . .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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