How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

What's worse than sitting in a car that's steered by a woman? Sitting in an airplane steered by a suicidal pilot.

How do you kill a blonde? Irreversibly damage her vital organs to the point where she loses consciousness and will never wake again.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

A blonde walks into a hairdressers salon. She gets her hair cut.

What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

How do you kill a ninja? Shoot it.

How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair

theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the black men.

how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

Why couldn't the little boy find his friend in hide and go seek He was blind

Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

42

How do you make a plumber cry? You kidnap his family.

What do you call a black man with a club? Tiger woods.

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What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

God is real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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