Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Two drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Ba-dum pssh.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple?  Getting raped by a 10 foot scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

democracy

thumb_up thumb_down +36

knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's Black

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Cause he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +125

what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Pineapple.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you calk a couple of friends hanging out? An intimate get-together.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man wearing a 'What Would Jesus Do' bracelet and a livestrong bracelet goes up to a blind kid and rubs his eyes and the kid can see. The kid was was not used to the bright lights and wandered into traffic, was hit by a car and killed instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are Blue Violets are Red I have Alsheimers... Cheese on Toast

thumb_up thumb_down -4

OK. so a guy walks up to another guy and says hi. The other guy said nothing. The other guy said hi again. The guy said nothing The guy got really mad and slapppeed him across the face. Finally the man said PURPLE RABBID COMPUTER TREES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and walked away while liking his blue brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing. The ocean is inanimate and therefore incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Knock Knock. Who's there? What's up. What's up who? The sky.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: If you see a gipsy drowning, what will you throw him?! A: His family.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: How did Mary get frostbite A: Her mother locked her in a freezer

thumb_up thumb_down +5

\ \ \\ \\ >\/ 7 _.-(6' \ (=__._/` \ ) \ | / / | / > / j < _\ _.-' : ``. \ r=._\ `. \ > ,.-' >.'

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops