what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill? Look there's 100 elephants coming over the hill What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill with sunglasses on? Nothing he did not recognize them

did you know towels can cause dry skin?

How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

Two black guys and a Latino were walking down the street. One of the black guys says to the Latino, "You have some lint on your suit." The Latino brushes it off and says, "Thank you. I have an important meeting with the board of trustees this afternoon, and it would have been embarrassing if I had lint on my suit."

"The only thing worse than being talked about is getting AIDS." -Oscar Wilde

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Why does Stuart go to Zu Bar? Because he deals cocaine to his fellow raving companions

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, nobody could fit inside a pineapple, nor could a pineapple survive in the sea

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was something of interest on the other side.

why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

Yo mama's like Darfur: Everyone feels bad for her, but nobody offers any substantial assistance.

Whats green and smells like grass? Grass scented air freshener, in a green colored can.

Why did the white guy sit on the bench while the black guys were playing basketball? His mother was calling, and his AP scores were coming in that day. Those scores were important to him.

Q: Whats black and white and red all over? A: I am unsure for I am color blind.

So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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