Why are we posting shit jokes on here? Because we can't drink!

What's funny? A joke. What's funnier than a joke? Two jokes.

Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

Why did the boy cry? Because his mother died of a heart attack.

What is your favorite joke? I like bar jokes. Okay knock knock Who's there? A bartender A bartender who? A bartender walks into a bar but before he went through the door, he decided to knock on the door because this lame joke is so random.

Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

why was 6 afraid of 7? because he raped her

A bear walks into a bar, and says "I would like a pint of..........beer." The bar tender asked "why the long pause?" The bear replies "I think I just had a stroke."

whats the difference between an orange and a bicycle? One has handlebars..the other one doesnt.

What's short, ruthless, and asian? Kim Jong Ill

Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

Your mumma is so fat, she has diabetes.

Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

What did the homeless man say to his family? Nothing. His family left him after he lost his job.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

What happened to Liam? He Died.

Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

Q: What do you call a Deer with no eyes? A: No ideer. Q; What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? A: Still no ideer.

The Sentence Below Is True The Sentence Above Is False

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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