How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Q: What do you get when you cross an alcoholic and a sex addict? A: A baby

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Steve. Steve who? I just said it was Steve

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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If pro- is the opposite of con-, what is the opposite of progress? regress

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Knock, knock ... ... ... Well I guess no one is home.

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A Sloth runs...

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A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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What happened when the boy didn't forward the chain message to ten people. Nothing.

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The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

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Your Mom is so fat... Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

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What happened to the village that got swept by a tsunami? It was destroyed.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

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What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

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what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

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Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

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What do you do when you're given a phonebook? You ask for their name.

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I was jacking off I don't use my hand tho, I just use my gf's vagiina

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

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how do you make a little girl cry?? Kill her family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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