Why did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

What did the Sony guy say when he hit the golf ball? PS FOUR!

what's funnier than hell? heaven

Your dad is so fat that he is on a diet.

Justin Beiber's Talent.

What do you call a man in front of three trains that have explosives tied to them and that are making amazingly loud noises? An idiot who obviously can't identify danger and probably had a childhood injury that cause his life to be ruined forever most likely cause by an evil uncle.

What is a grammatically incorrect equestrian? An stallion.

Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

holocaust is bad but its funny when you use it as a joke hehe

do yo know what's funnier than getting on a hidden camera show? Nope! it's just chuck testa

What's worse than being raped? Not a whole lot-- rape is a very serious mental and emotional strain that will stick with a person for the remainder of their life.

GONNA

Is your plant made out of Osmium, Molybdenum, Silicon and Sulfur? Because it's going through OsMoSiS. That was just a joke, not a pick up line. Unless I was giving a pick-up line to your plant, which I definitely wasn't...

Q: what's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon A: well the first noticable difference is that the watermelon tastes better.

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

What do you call a horse with no eyes? A horse with no eyes.

What do you do if you see a man on the street with a pineapple up his bum? Take him to the hospital to have the pineapple removed professionally. It could be potentially dangerous for his health.

whats stupid, retarded, and dumb an Erin Perri.

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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