you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

"Ask me if I'm a lamp." "Are you a lamp?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, I OFFERED YOU SOME CEREAL, MADE OUT OF MY DOGS POO BY VICKY AND RENATA WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Your Mama's so fat she can't fit into a toy car!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the deaf Jewish Rabbi say to the Italian Priest. What?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you make a burns victim cry? You show them a mirror.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you teach another person's son to ride a bike? You don't. Let his real parents teach him to ride a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you kill a blonde? By inactivating major functions in the body, for example cutting off the blood supply to the brain.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What would Michael Jackson do if he were on the Moon? Nothing he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,029

What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Guy: I have a penis growing out of my crotch. Girl: Hah, sucks to be you! Guy: Yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

All these jokes are very entertaining, but if you look closely, Lebron clearly travels. Wheres the call ref what the hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops