whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

Why couldn't the woman drive the car? Because she was a woman.

A white man is running away from a black man. Because they are Playing tag. A gaming involving to touch the other person

What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

women's rights.

why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chu... Forget this, this is overused.

Did you hear about the guy with seven fingers? You should, because almost everybody has seven fingers.

There was was 14 apples in a tree. And that's it.

How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

A young farmers cow died in an oil burning, The farmer then said to his son; you get the milk ill get the shovel

knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

Try this on someone... go up and say "Ive got a great knock knock joke for you but you have to start" there response "Ok, knock knock" you say "Who's there?" They are usually dumbfounded and a hilarious awkward silence ensues

What did the rapper Proof say when he got in a fight? Nothing, Proof is dead.

Why did the man have no friends? He mudered and ate someone in '86 and is rotting in prison.

A sick patient asks a doctor, "will i be able to play my guitar?" The doctor replies, "of course you will be able to". "Good because that is my only form of income", says the patient.

what do a parrot and a hippo have in common? i want to kill every non white human being!!!!

Why is the chicken afraid of the tiger? Chickens are inferrior to tigers and could easily be eaten.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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