Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

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Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

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what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

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Q:When a terrorist attack happened what did the woman with the 1 leg say? A: HOP for your lives!!!!

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Three Jew begin to walk down the street, they then pursue walking and purchase many goodies from vendors.

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What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

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cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

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If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

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went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

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Q: How do you call a group of animals? A: Llama.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

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When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

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Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

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What's long and sexy? The Eiffel Tower

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What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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