What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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what's more fun then stapling a dead baby to a fence? ripping it off

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

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what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimers, Hey i just met you.

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What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

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You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

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What does a scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!!

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

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A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

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Women's rights.

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

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What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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What do you call a million pigs jumping out of an aircraft? Bacon.

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who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

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Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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