What do you call some one in the middle of the ocean without a boat skrewed.

Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

i'll leave 'em dead in the living room. get it leave 'em dead in the living room

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

What did the Rabbi say to the priest? The holocaust was real and it tore apart my family.

Q: what do you call a man eating some chicken ? A: a hungry man (hahahahahahaha.......i should get a life)

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

What's long, hard, and full of seamen... A Submarine

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken!!!!!

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

Why did an old man cause a car accident? He gotf a heart attack.

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Two men drove their car of a cliff. They died.

What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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