Know knock Who's there The fat lady off her medicine ball Call 000

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What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

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When life gives you lemons, You find a new life

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What can you sit on, drink from and sleep on? A chair, a cup and a bed.

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What do you call a person from China? Chinese, duh.

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Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

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Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

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What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. These are facts. Good day.

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What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

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A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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Women's rights

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"what did the priest say to the rabbi?" "what" "my religions better

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A man walks into a bar, ouch!

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68

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A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

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A black man walks into a bank with a gun......he is a 25-year veteran SWAT team officer attempting to arrest two armed robbers that have 5 old ladies hostage.

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what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

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What's long, hard, and filled with semen? A submarine

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Why wasn't the black man allowed on the golf course? Because a wealthy business man had rented out the entire course for a very important international investor.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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