So a guy is playing jeopardy and decides to choose the category "Therapist." so he tells the host, "I'll take the rapist for 200."

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What's Tammie short for? Diabetes claimed both her legs.

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how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

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The Pope

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Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

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Q: When birds fly in a "V", why is one side always longer? A: There is one extra bird on that side

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete

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How does Justin Bieber remove a condom? he farts

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An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

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jimmy carr walks into a tax office.

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Q: Why did the guy ring the doorbell? A: Because he was sick of all the crappy knock-knock jokes

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Whoop-dee-do.

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Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? Because they kept saying Bach bach Bach. No. Beethoven was deaf. He couldnt understand what they were saying.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

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OMG my mom just let me go to a concert in feb 31,2012 wohoo! LOL

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was getting chased by a pedophile

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A young boy asks his father if there will be cake at the party. The father tells him there won't be and tells him to f*ck off.

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He actually planned to visit his family on the other side, but unfortunately he did not look both ways so was involved in a terrible car accident. His family now mourns their loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops