What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

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How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

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What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? I don't know... That action was so barbarous that it freaked me out, and I was no longer in the vicinity of the area. Since I don't have supersonic hearing, I couldn't pick up anything they were saying...

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Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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What happened to the famous musician when he overdosed? He overdosed.

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Waiter, waiter, there's a fly in my soup! That's not a fly, it's a gnat.

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Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

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So a horse walks into a bar, animal service is called and after being unable to locate the owner he is put down.

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What call a duck with no wings? A deformity.

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A funny joke: Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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A Black Child just received his ivy-league diploma and hugged his dad.

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Why did little Betsy have a stomach ache? Her alcoholic mother pinned her down in a drunken rage and made her drink bleach.

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a man checks his brand new cellphone to see if he has a text message... He has cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was an object of great appeal to him on the other side.

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Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

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Several men are in a bar a tall white man named James orders a round of shots for all of the people they all have a fun time untill James gets into a car with Derrick who is not sober they drive right into a sick childrens hospital and cause many frantic wild fires throughout the town. They all end up in jail for an unrelated cause

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red Oh no! Someone's been murdered in my garden!

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You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

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A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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