9

thumb_up thumb_down -129

Q: A black person and a white person decided to have a race, who won? A: The black person, as he exercised and worked out on a regular basis, making him very fast.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you call a guy with no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What a wonderfuuuul wooorld: Would this not be a wonderful world if we instead of killing innocent children, just gRaped them hard and painfully in every damn hole and let them go home? Ad: Consider the life of the poor children, Just 0rape them hard!... For love! Awww... Moral: What moral You see any moral here? XD No Not Nerometal, I am that "leader of the Neronist... whatever" Yes, that is who I am. Real moral: "Seriously who is gonna listen to some kid who is just (severely) butthurt anyway huh? Cut their tongues off! Just do not kill them... For a wonderful world..." <3 (Not a heart lol)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

thumb_up thumb_down -11

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse replies "my wife died yesterday." the next day the bartender wakes up and realises that it didn't happen and that he is a drunk asshole with no life.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Tunechi

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

thumb_up thumb_down +24

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A young woman goes to a wild, infamous nightclub, all alone. She arrives safely at home a few hours later.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Why did the little Canadian girl start crying ? A: Because her mum through a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Yo momma is so dumb, the tests came back positive for mental retardation and she has been given an expected life expectancy of 2 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How did the blind dyslexic boy find his way out of the cornfield? -He drew backwords numbers and letters in the dirt

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops