Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: A sad, unfortunate dog.

why did the woman cross the road? to get groceries for making more sandwiches.

josh Roberts you speccy CUNT

What's green and smells like yellow paint? Green paint.

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

What do u call a black man playing a jumping sport? I don't know but it is totally normal.

How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

Sigh, visit me with a pack of condoms, that is so romantic... Now you tell me something, how old are you REALLY and what is your real name? Oh yeah, my first name is Tifa (I know you hate it for some reason), and I am turning 24 in 30 days.

why is 6 scared of 7 because 7 is scary...

what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

A black man is sitting in front of the bus Then he respectfully gives up his seat to an elder woman

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

Which square is small and yellow? The small, yellow square.

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

Did you hear about the 2 car crash in a walmart parking lot? 50 mexicans died

How do you get a black man down from a tree? If the man cannot climb down himself, perhaps call the fire department.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

How do you kill a blonde? By inactivating major functions in the body, for example cutting off the blood supply to the brain.

What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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