What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

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Why did one sausage become scared of the other sausage? The first Sausage said " Hello " and the second Sausage said " OMG a talking sausage!!!" ...Jk sausages dont talk.

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Why did the cow cross the road? -Because it lives in India and is allowed to.

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What's the easiest way to become filthy rich? There are many ways to earn money. Invest some time into researching the topic.

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? K

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what do you call a black drug dealer? A pharmacist.

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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An Asian Man Has His Eyes Wide Open

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

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How many times have I told you not to do that? Fourteen.

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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Q: A blonde walks into a bar. What does she get? A: An icepack.

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What's black, white and red all over? A cow after slaughter.

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What has 4 eyes and cant see? Mississippi

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Actually a better question would be, why is the chicken near a road in the first place?

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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Theres an app for the iPhone.

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So I'm at the office and I tell this guy, "Hey can you pass me the stapler. But when you pass it over, make sure there are staples in it 'cause if not, I can't staple anything."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. The chicken was run over by a truck before he could get to the other side

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Write your own

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whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

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Guess what i just did. Master bait.

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops