If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

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what was hitlers rap album called? straight outta mein kampfton

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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Skittles are tasteless. Why? You can't taste the rainbow.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a Mexican? A large pizza can feed a family.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Shes dead.

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A man trips on an old bottle. He picks it up and out pops a genie. "I will grant you three wishes!" says the genie. "Whatever you so desire is my com--" "I'm already late for a meeting!" shouts the man. He drops the bottle and continues on.

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What do you call a wine-o? A Alco-colic.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? She is a goner.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

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A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

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How do you take a Mexican's money? You can't because they have none.

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Whats brown, large, thick, and sticky? a stick

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What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

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Your mother is so bad at cooking that people often remark on how bad at cooking she is.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The Police The Police who? We're sorry Ma'am your son has died in a car accident... --------- Knock Knock! Who's there? Not your son

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A man walks into a bar. -Can I ask where am I? - he sais -Yes, you can. - sais the barman Awkward silence occurs. -Why aren't you asking? I said you can.

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A man rubs a magic lamp nothing happens

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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