Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gate open and chickens typically wonder with no obvious pattern to their movements.

What do Whitney Houston and Selena Gomez have in common? They are both dead. Exept for Selena Gomez..

whats similar between a eagle and a armidillo? they both can fly. apart from the armidillo.

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs taste better in stews.

Why couldn't the little girl color in her coloring book? Her arms were amputated.

whats the difference between a door knob? a milk carton, because people have legs so they can walk !!!!!

what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

A boy with red hair is happy.

what did the jewish kid get for his birthday......Striped pajamas

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Baby you think i loved you, but you got played too

This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

Women rights..

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

What did the door say to the hand? Please stop caressing me!

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

What is red and green and goes round and round? A frog in a blender!

What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

Why was O.J acquitted for murder? A jury of his peers deliberated for many days and found there was not sufficient evidence for his conviction.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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