What happened when the high school student had intercourse with his history teacher? orgasmic noises.

why did Bernard have a bold because I ripped his Mohawk

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

Why didn't the boy have any toes? - Because he did not have any legs.

Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

If you share rice between 30 Africans what do they each have? Aids.

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

What did the carrot say when it was thrown out of an airplane? Nothing. It's a carrot.

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

What is meant by the term 'Biological control''? Not ending up on the Jeremy Kyle Show.

What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

a woman gets hit by a motorcycle whose fault was it?......... the man's, he shouldn't have driven the motorcycle in the kitchen

You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, and only one eye? Dave.

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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