what did the girls scream when they were being stalked? skydragon

Why did the chicken cross the road? -I don't care

Whats the differance between a blond and a rock? I don't know. I can't think of any.

One drunk bug looks over to another drunk bug and guess what it says? Your a glitch

How do you make a little girl cry?

Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

What do you a badass who not a badass. Grant Lousbury.

what happens every day? People die

Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

Two construction workers are working on the final floor of what will soon be the worlds tallest building. The first turns to the other and says: "Hey tom can you throw me a three quarters hex wrench? i think my set is metric." the second guy turns around and says: "yea, here you go."

A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

theres safety in numbers? tell that to 6 million jews

You know what happens when there's an awkward silence... Everyone feels a little bit uncomfortable for a brief moment in time.

What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

Why did the person write an antijoke? To get to the other side

Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

When life gives you ponies... get a new life!

How do you know if there is an elephant in your fridge? Well, because there's an elephant in your fridge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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