A blond walks into McDonalds. She orders and leaves.

So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

LOL we are spamming this site too much!

How did the blonde reply to the male man when he asked how she was? "I'm good."

whatt dont w do you call a person with legs that dont work Crippled

Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

Your mama's teeth are so yellow... She should think about scheduling an appointment at a local dentist's office.

Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an 0rgy.

"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

canada

What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

How did the boy cross the road? He didn't he had polio.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. So is my eye. I get abused.

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

What's brown and sticky? Anal

Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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