Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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Why did the baby stop crying? I shot it with a 9mm pistol and put it in the microwave because it cried while I was watching Sienfeld.

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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How much moss must a Moschops chop if a Moschops must chop moss?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

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Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

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What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

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You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

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roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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What happens when you put Michael Jackson in a room full of little boys? The 3 year-old rotting corpse of Michael Jackson and a room full of traumatized little boys.

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops